This finance personality freed herself from $300K in debt — by replacing her shame with strategy. Here’s how she helps others find purpose in their finances through ‘curiosity’

Boundaries before budgets

Aliche’s financial transformation started with a boundary. After losing her husband in 2021, she found herself saying yes to everyone and everything. But as she began to rebuild her life, she learned the value of saying no — not just to others, but to financial patterns and mindsets that no longer served her.

“When you’ve grown up in survival mode, especially in communities where poverty is generational, it is hard to emotionally accept that you are no longer broke,” Aliche said.

At her lowest point, Aliche was grappling with student loans, credit card debt and a mortgage she couldn’t afford. Then came a recession, a layoff and a slow-motion collapse that left her bouncing between her childhood bedroom, her sister’s couch and eventually a rented room. Her finances weren’t just strained; her identity was in crisis.

And while much of her people-pleasing was shaped by her upbringing, research suggests these behaviors may run even deeper. A University of Michigan study found that children as young as five show emotional reactions to spending and saving that influence their real-life financial choices — reactions that aren’t always modeled by their parents. In other words, your relationship with money might not just be inherited, it might be instinctual. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be reprogrammed.

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Build your way up

Aliche didn’t let rock bottom be her final chapter. Through financial therapy, she started unpacking the emotional baggage attached to her spending and saving habits. By identifying the patterns that no longer served her, she began replacing shame with strategy.

One of the best pieces of advice she received was simple but powerful: “Keep your overhead low” and “live within your means.” That mindset became her launchpad — allowing her to save, invest and rebuild with purpose.

She also emphasizes that you don’t need to have all the answers to make smart choices. “Financial literacy starts with curiosity, not perfection,” says Aliche. The biggest mistake you can make is not asking questions when the stakes are still small. Sometimes the most expensive thing isn’t what’s on your credit card — it’s the lesson you didn’t learn in time.

If you’re feeling stuck on where to begin your financial journey, working with a financial advisor might be a smart first move. An advisor can help you set clear goals, steer you away from common money mistakes and spot areas in your spending that could use a tune-up. Think of financial literacy less like a one-and-done class and more like a lifelong playlist that evolves with market swings, investment trends and your own goals. Having a professional in your corner can not only save you from costly missteps but also boost your confidence when it’s time to make a big financial decision.